can't let 'em get the best of me

Starbucks, that is.  A few weeks ago I posted here that for the first time in about 12 years, I was about to go to work outside the home.  I recently became a Starbucks barista... and I have to admit, the job is pretty fun while I'm there, but it is kickin' my booty big time.  I work the opening shift most days starting at 4am... which means I wake up at 3am.  Holy moly... I'm not as young as I used to be!  And I'm feelin' it.  I don't have a problem getting up at that hour... or being genuinely cheerful before the crack of dawn.  But what is hard is that in the afternoons, when I'm home with my kids, I'm super tired and probably not a whole lot of fun.  I'm realizing I have to be careful not to let Starbucks get the best of me.  As in the best part of me... the happy, nice, patient me.  Somehow I've got to figure out some balance so there's plenty left for my family.  Take now for instance... I'd love to be painting, but I really should be sleeping.  I'm sitting in bed as I type, but felt like getting this out before drifting off tonight.  I need to come up with some sort of schedule that works.  There are so many things pining for my time and I have to come up with a system to make things like laundry, cleaning, cooking, playing, painting and resting not seem so overwhelming.  I do hope that this working thing is just for a season.  I really want to work from home, doing art, where I call the shots and wake up and go to sleep and have days off when I want.  But for now this is my lot and I need some balance to make it all work.  I have a husband and four amazing kids who are growing and changing, and I don't want to miss it.  I want to find a way to tend to my responsibilities while savoring precious time with my loved ones.  Right now it's a huge adjustment.  But I have hope that balance is just around the corner.

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